The Cornell Review recently reported that Cornell University’s health center is considering making vibrators available in on-campus dispensaries. This news comes on the heels of Yale University promoting the same policy via a lecture entitled "Pleasure, Physiology, and Sex Toys." Ivy League feminism is now taking the form of a giant rubber penis. Welcome to the 21st century!
On Wednesday night, the Yale University heath services center hosted a speech by sex therapist Carol Queen. Queen runs a sex shop in San Francisco called Good Vibrations, which, according to the Yale Daily News, sells everything from "butt-plugs" to the "Hitachi magic wand," the latter of which Queen referred to as "the Cadillac of vibrators." During the course of her speech, Queen waved around several models of vibrators and told the crowd:
"It may seem surprising that this is a small selection [of vibrators], but at my store we’ve got many, many more."
At Cornell University, the vibrator craze is being led by Somjen Frazer, a member of the Cornell Women’s Health Initiative. Frazer told the Cornell Daily Sun:
"At this point, you either go online or to the sort of scary and not very woman-affirming sex-shop downtown."
This raises some interesting questions. What would a "woman-affirming" sex shop look like? Does Carol Queen’s sex emporium qualify? Frazer says that one of the key benefits of having on-campus provision of vibrators is that "the dispensary will give out educational materials explaining how to properly clean a vibrator that two women are going to share."
This is what the feminist movement has come to -- promoting the sharing and cleaning of vibrators in lesbian sex. Susan B. Anthony would be so proud.
Some folks are thrilled at the vibrator proposal because it will mean an end to the stigma associated with female self-stimulation. Christopher Dial, a homosexual activist known for his support of student-funded drag shows, proclaimed:
"I think this is a very productive move because the sex industry is associated with back alleys, black boxes, and seedy sales people."
Who knows how many people have died because of back alley masturbation? How long will it be until we hear tales of botched masturbation with assorted vegetables? The horror! Vibrators need to be safe, legal, and rare.
Unfortunately for feminists, the pro-vibrator lobby is causing some embarrassment for Cornell and Yale. For instance, National Review’s "Corner" has picked up the story and readers are having a lot of fun coming up with double entendres ("There is a real feverish back and forth on the hot issue," "This lacks any penetrating analysis" or "What a cockamamie proposal."). Sharon Dittman, associate director for community relations at Cornell, has gone into full denial mode, insisting that vibrators and sex really aren’t linked: "Vibrators or personal massagers may have a broader appeal to those who use our massage therapy services for muscle relaxation. [Using a vibrator] can be a part of a holistic health approach."
If you have a giant rubber penis vibrating against your sore hamstring, you’ve got problems.
Frazer echoed Dittman’s remarks with this bizarre observation:
"Women have some really pressing health issues that don’t relate to sexuality. It’s not just about sex. It’s about seeing a women as a whole person."
Who knew that a woman’s "whole person" was defined by her sex toys? Feminism teaches us something new everyday.
The modern feminist movement has been in free-fall for years, but its influence still remains strong on college campuses. Steadily, its policies have devalued young women by encouraging "liberation" through (i) frequent out-of-wedlock sex with multiple partners, (ii) abortion, (iii) divorce, and now (iv) sex toys. Campus feminist rhetoric is beginning to resemble "Man Show" banter (without the humor). Most importantly, feminism instructs women to be open and proud of their sexual deviance. The movement’s latest foray into the world of sex toys should serve as a wake-up call to mainstream college women who have flirted with feminist ideology.
Then again, maybe college women will react just like Cornell student Sara Jacobs, who capsulated the current state of the feminist movement when she told the Sun:
"I think one of the most important things is for women to be able to get themselves off."
They are women, hear them roar, with vibrators too big to ignore!