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The Baker Cure By: Julia Gorin
FrontPageMagazine.com | Thursday, December 14, 2006

After several weeks, the much talked-about Iraq Study Group--tasked with finding a solution to the Iraq problem--announced its proposal, conceived mainly by former Secretary of State James Baker: The way to fix Iraq is for Israel to withdraw from the West Bank and Golan Heights.

The proposal is titled “F--k the Jews. They don’t vote for us anyway.”

Jimmy Carter was seen slapping his forehead and saying, “D’oh! Why didn’t I hire that guy?!”

Even as I’ve kvelled over the past six years of the Bush administration’s almost unprecedented Israel-friendly disposition, I’ve whispered to friends, “Wouldn’t it be ironic if it all ended up just setting us up for the biggest betrayal of Israel yet?” I of course shunned the possibility.


Until James Baker was exhumed.


Not knowing where Baker stood on Jews or Israel, I’d given him the benefit of the doubt in the 80s when he made the famous quote, thinking he was just talking in shorthand and in private to someone worried about getting the Jewish vote. But apparently, “f--k the Jews” means “f--k the Jews.” (Now if only we could believe the Muslims when they say it about all of us.)


An Insight Magazine article last week on Baker’s plan reads like a satire:


The White House has been examining a proposal by James Baker to launch a Middle East peace effort without Israel. The peace effort would begin with a U.S.-organized conference, dubbed Madrid-2, and contain such U.S. adversaries as Iran and Syria. Officials said Madrid-2 would be promoted as a forum to discuss Iraq's future, but actually focus on Arab demands for Israel to withdraw from territories captured in the 1967 war. They said Israel would not be invited to the conference.


“As Baker sees this, the conference would provide a unique opportunity for the United States to strike a deal without Jewish pressure,” an official said. “This has become the most hottest proposal examined by the foreign policy people over the last month.”


Officials said Mr. Baker's proposal…has been supported by Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, Undersecretary of State Nicholas Burns and National Intelligence Director John Negroponte...Officials said the Baker proposal to exclude Israel from a Middle East peace conference garnered support in the wake of Vice President Dick Cheney's visit to Saudi Arabia on Nov. 25. They said Mr. Cheney spent most of his meetings listening to Saudi warnings that Israel, rather than Iran, is the leading cause of instability in the Middle East


Officials said the conference would seek to win Arab support on Iraq in exchange for a U.S. pledge to renew efforts to press Israel to withdraw from the West Bank and Golan Heights.


“Baker sees his plan as containing something for everybody, except perhaps the Israelis,” the official said…


Mr. Baker's recommendation to woo Iran and Syria has also received support from some in the conservative wing of the GOP. Over the last week, former and current Republican leaders in Congress…have called for Iranian and Syrian participation in an effort to stabilize Iraq.


One is reminded of the time Carter tried to dissuade Arab leaders from joining the first Gulf War coalition, convinced that Saddam Hussein would pull out of Kuwait if only Israel pulled out of the West Bank.


Indeed, think of all the problems that could be solved if only Israel pulled out of Israel. First, there's global warming: just one year after Israel pulled out of Gaza, the UN itself has found that man has a whopping 25% less impact on climate change than we thought. This means that if Israel would just give up the Golan Heights, we could cure AIDS, and if it gave away half of Jerusalem, then poverty wouldn't be an issue anymore. Granting Palestinians the right of return, also mentioned in the ISG report, could end crime, and of course ceding the West Bank would not only solve world hunger but would also put a stop to the accusations about Jews running all the banks.


For his part, Vice President Cheney “‘didn’t even get the opportunity to seriously discuss the purpose of his visit—that the Saudis help the Iraqi government and persuade the Sunnis to stop their attacks,’ another official familiar with Mr. Cheney’s visit said. ‘Instead, the Saudis kept saying that they wanted a U.S. initiative to stop the Israelis’ attack in Gaza and Cheney just agreed.’”


If I know anything about this man, rather than agreement, his yessing and nodding was more in glassy-eyed resignation to what he saw before him: a clear vision of the free world’s eventual demise.


For the United States to be admitting feeling helpless in Iraq by going to the culprits for help, offering a blood trade and to some extent making them our masters may be an unprecedented American low.


A reminder for those who need it: Jihad doesn't mean Jewhad. It means you too. What Baker, along with these other altercockers, doesn’t understand is that to his Arabs, he is a Jew.

Baker, Carter, Hamilton and Bush Sr.: Get out of foreign policy and get on the Viagra. That’s what it’s there for. It’s for when old men no longer know what to do with themselves and start reinserting themselves into foreign policy.

Take an example from Bob Dole: is he trying to stay relevant? No, because he sought help from Viagra and now entertains himself by watching Britney Spears Pepsi commercials with his dog. Dogs are great. They don’t mind if you’re Jewish, or if you’re too old to be of any use to anyone.

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